I am 1 in 4.

I am a mother of an angel gone way too soon. She was too good for this Earth and God had other plans for her life than in my arms. The excitement, the joy, and the love I had the minute that second pink line showed up on Christmas morning will never be forgotten even though just 3 short days later my worst nightmare happened and my precious baby was taken from my womb to be with Jesus in Heaven.

As the bleeding started, emotions flooded. I started questioning God, why me?, why did you take her so soon?, why couldn’t I hold her in my arms?, did I do something wrong?, is this my fault?.

I begged and pleaded that this was just a pregnancy complication and I would be able to keep by precious little one, but God had other plans. He needed her more than I did, but that was hard to understand. I am her mother and I didn’t even get to see a picture of her in my womb, I didn’t get to hold her, I didn’t get to know what she looked liked, I didn’t get to feel her move in my womb and carry her for 9 months, I didn’t get to see the joy on my husbands or sons face when they met her for the first time…. the list can go on, but this was his plan, not mine and I didn’t understand.

I searched and searched for answers. I didn’t feel like others understood me even though they were by my side everyday. I was still missing something until I was lead by the Holy Spirit to the Christian bookstore and found the book “Unexpecting: Real Talk on Pregnancy Loss”. A book written by Rachel Lewis who I never met but became a friend instantly. She knew exactly what I was going through. Every page and every word written spoke to me. Life without my little one was still not easy by any means, but knowing someone else understood me, helped me through the grieving process.

Nobodies story is the same.

Nobodies way to cope with losing a child, no mater the age, is the same.

I know this is not easy and I want to say I am so sorry for your loss of your beautiful and perfect little one.

In memory of my sweet little one, Blayke McKee, I want to be a support person for you. I wanted to provide you with the resource of this book to help guide you through the tough days. From one angel mama to another, I want to be a support person you can reach out to. Please contact me at anytime of the day via the contact form below, texting (937)-726-9386, or email kmckee@beautifulbeginningsandwellness.com.